"You don't need that, It can wait." -Parents

So my parents and I we're having a talk about having a boyfriend. It's not a bad thing, of course not! I mean if you love the person, you can't help it right? But anyway, they we're telling me how certain others have no shame in front of certain elders, they just do all that disgusting things infront someone who cares A LOT for them. And I guess if you we're there, you'd understand what i'm trying to say. But it's disgusting me because some people just don't know when to turn it offf you know? And having someone that cares a lot for you see you doing disgusting things w/ your boyfriends is not a pretty view, if you ask me. I've seen it before, & I've probably kisssed a boy in front of the whole world (Wooopee!) But seeing it with my own two eyes, disgusts me. Hearing it from my parents, disgusts me. And just talking about PDA itself, disgusts me. Some people should learn when to turn it on & when to turn that shi' off & RESPECT ya' elders & the youngin's because you don't know just WHO might be lookin' up to ya.
Anywho, I'm just thankful for my parents everday! =) They teach me right from wrong and always want the best for me & my future. I loveee them, the most!


On the other hand, I've finally made up my mind and I AM gonna attend the OLPH Retreat =) I mean, I attend RCIA so why not go to the retreat, right? I really wanna experience what everyones talking about & of course, get closer to the man above, GOD :) Mhm.

Oh & since ash wednesday I havn't been eating meat, hahaha! Fucking record man [; But I havn't really been doing anything productive either besides school projects and homework ;( I swear, School is gettin' a bit harder by the minute but I KNOW I can pull my self through! Just like what my daddy ALWAYS tells me: "Don't give up. Nothings hard unless you try. Set your mind to it & do it" Hmm, well that's pretty much all I have to update on although it might not be much of an update, lol. Sunday tomorrow, you know what that means ... RCIA & Mass @ 5 w/ the girls, <3

"Everybody knows" - John Legend

School was a tad bit boring! Actually, not just a tad bit but MAJOR -_- I really don't know what it was but I just wasn't feelin' today. Geometry, Mr. Pasalo put a lot on our hands. Spent most of class time doing work. Biology was boring! And again, I was falling asleep. Gosh, can Bio get any boring- er? Geez. Lunch, was boring period. Health was stupid. Supposed to go to the library but the dumb bitch wouldn't let us in. Actually we went in and got kicked out. Then we had to wait for Uyeda to let us in .. Not even 5 seconds and we got kicked out yet again 'cause the librarian thought we yelled when someone actually sneezed! >;[ How ANNOYING. Ran 2 laps for that, ugh. English was so much better despite the tons of writing. Hm, Daddy picked me up afterschool & stopped over McD's for something to munch on =) Probably gonna go visit Zayla & Xayden tonight. I misss em'! =)


I was gonna post up my Horoscopes from IScopes but the program just isn't cooperating with me right now. Welll, got a health project to worry about & other things for school -_- LATER

It's the start of Lent, & There are a couple of things I wanted to give up for Lent like Meat, Soda, Fast-food & Negative thoughts.


Anyway, School was alright. Better than most days & cold! Madre picked me up afterschool and went home straight. I know right .. on a Wednesday? Lol, but that's alright. Decided that I'd go Mass w/ the girls for Ash Wednesday & I did. It was good :] Although they we're soemthings that bothered me .. but I tried to not let it get the best of me because .. things happen. Mhm.
That's pretty much it, I still have the ashes on my forehead. Haha.

Hm, Ethel called me around 10 & I must say that was the LONGEST conversation we've had on the phone. Talked about her boy troubles and what not. Something that I really don't get is how he's hurting because the girl he 'LIKES', loves another. But he's making Ethel feel like how he feels right now, HURT. And I reallly care for Ethel that we conversated for so long because I wanted to give her best advice you know .. It hurts to hear her crying because of some dumb boy. -___- Then again, Life goes on you know? And I certainly don't want her wasting her time on someone who just doesn't care! 2 times already- she seriously has NOTHING to lose.

ANYWHO, I guess i'm calllin' it a night. Hellla tired! Good night.

Tiring

The weather was great!

School wasn't much, as always.

Afterschool, Daddy picked me up. Mommy came to get us to head down to

my daddy's MRI appointment at Pali Momi. Waited forevvva for him -__-

After that, townbound it was. Went to visit Uncle Blair .. Welll, I had to wait

in the waiting room since he was in ICU & only certain amount of people could

go in. But anyway, Hopefully all goes well.. <3>

in traffic going back into Ewa Beach, ugh! >;[ It's so bad, I was so frustrated

but whatever. Went to my brother house and just cruised it 'till charity's mom

came home.. Got home around 10 & i'm fucking beat. -__- I'm even falling

asleep right now ! Well school & church tomorrow. Tomorrow is the start of

Lent & i'm giving up MEAT & Soda (even though I BARELY drink soda),

so yeah .. 'tilll then, g o o d n i g h t!

Reminiscinn'

You know what I miss? ..


Vent sessions at my old house. I miss venting to my girls because they always understood me and always knew what to say! It's not like I can't talk to them anymore, because I CAN .. It's just not the same anymore. I missssssss mainsix!

Lol, so lame but true. Blaaaah! Nowadays I can't even talk to anybody because no one really understands me and the things I go through, boohoo!

Work hard, play later.

My english teacher left us with a major project to do over the weekend, so it left me with no choice but to stay home & do it! like always, I tend to procrastinate so I ended up staying awake 'till 1130 last night, not bad as I thought. Although, I only got 2 out of 3 vignettes done due to frustration!! Butt that's all over now, so thank god! Hopefully that vignette project turns my B into an A because I sure did work my butt off! Hahaha.


Anyhoots, this weekend wasn't much. Lots of things has been happening with the family. And because this is blogger, and random people tend to read my blogs; i'll keep this one to myself. I do hope everythings gets better but I don't think anytime soon -__- Just got to have faith in everything!

Well, off to do a bit of homework since I've been slacking health class (which is one of my easiest classses!) because i've been so lazy lately, haha. Laterrrr!

WELCOME

BABY XAYDEN ZADE KAZUYUKI YAMAMOTO-EA!

Hella' handsome boy & i'm pretty sure his mommy & daddy (my brother) is hella' blessed to have him =D I know Zayla is too because she was so excited to see him in the Nursery ^__^ Hehe. I am pretty much happy to have a handsome japanese/filipino nephew like him! Yay!

Aside from that, Nothing much to update on. Just been going to the hospital everyday since Xayden was born. Two days, in fact. Hopefully he gets to go home today, hopefully. I was at the hospital yesterday & Zaylarina was there so we went to the 3rde floor nursery but Xayden wasn't there, & we could of sworn we seen someone just like Xayden, but Zayla said "whea the light?" So we got a call from my brother to go to the 4th floor nursery, so we did. We got there & see this baby in the incubator & I guess that was the light Zayla was talking about .. & we see this babyboy with the same hat like Xayden so Zayla's all like "they he is! that's brother!." I told Zayla that Xayden looked like her & she's all like " I don't theenk sho" LOL! Come to find out they already put him back in the room so technically we've been staring at the wrong baby for 5 minutes! So sad! I swore that baby looked like Xayden! Lol. So we went back to room & just talked stories & see Xayden (Zay-den, just with an X to make it look different from others , I guess) But I love Zayla & Xayden ^___^ Hopefully Xayden grows up to be a smarty pants just like Zayla! Zayla got the mouth full of words for a 2-year-old :)

Other than that, That's all I have yet to update on. Sayoonara!

Thankful.

Sometimes you give so much that people start to take advantage of it because they know you'll always be willing to give them chances. But this time around, it's got my own cousin involved & the talk we had last night really made me realize that i'm only standing around because you can't stand on your own, because you don't even wanna let go, because you can't do it without me. I realized that I'm wasting time trying to analyze every situation and explain it to you over & over when your only not gonna get it. This is my choice, to move on & live life already. I've done way too much. I don't even know what made you the way you are now.We're not even together but I still feel like your holding me down! I'm just thankful that my cousin & I talked about. Without that talk, I wouldn't even know where to end. I have the strength to leave, & I will. I feel like I shouldn't waste my time on this. I feel like I don't need to waste my breath having to yell everynight. You never trusted me, you never believe me, & you never understood me .. What am I gonna stand around for? SHIT HAPPENS, REALIZE IT. We all have to deal with it, doesn't matter if it hurts us or not. God has many things planned for you in the future, & same goes for me.

It's my choice. If I don't get out of it now, then i'll be in a much deeper situation later ..
Once I turn around, I'm never turning back.
Life goes on, realize it. It's something you should learn to do.

And to my cousin, thank you. Without you, I wouldn't know where to end or where to even find the strength to leave. I'm so glad i'm close with you & that I can tell you anything because I know you'll be willing to listen to me and all the problems I have. I love you.

4-DAY WEEKEND.

This weekend was good =)

Thursday - Sleepover Kalihi. Baked Mud-Cake. Man oh man, it was so DELICIOUS! =D
Friday- Baked Cupcakes. Went to Fishers & Costco. Got me some smooth pens =)
Saturday- Valentines day. Supposed to go Palace but didn't end up going. -__- Stayed home the whole day, But we baked more cupcakes HA.
Sunday- Church & Alas.
Monday- Shopping w/ mommy. Veiwing service for cousins grandma. ;( Really wasn't in the mood the whole night. & then I see someone I don't wanna just makes me even more B l e h. -_-
Anyway, If there was one thing I learned, it is: To live life to it's fullest because you'll never know what may happen or what can. Always expect the unexpected & never let anyone stop you from doing what you wanna do. Life is short, so live it & love it. <3

Havn't got much rest this weekend so i'm calling it a night.
Oh & YAYYY! Baby Xayden Zade Kazuyuki Ea is arriving in one week as of today ^_^ Can't wait to see that baby boy <3

Short days.

I've been bustin' my ass in school, and it hope it all pays off when it comes to progress reports. EVEN IF it's just progress reports, it still matters to me! HA.

School was alright. Nothing different.
1. Worked on my cognitive tutor. Thanks to ash for giving me the formula's! You made my life easier! HA. Speeded my way through chapters 8, 9, 10, 11, & 12 since we needed to be on chapter 13 by today. So lucky me, I'm done :)
2. Uh, rearranged tables. Nothing really exciting except for doing lab for the first time. BORING.
Lunch, sat at pasalo's working on cognitive tutor. Nothing much.
3. 10 minutes late. BOOHOO, who cares. Watched 'Supersize Me', took notes, talk to michelle, edmen, and chanel. Watched Mr. Uyeda fall asleep while he was putting grades into webgrader. It was pretty hilarious if you asked me. It's one of those you-had-to-be-there moments. Hahahaha. That was the highlight of my day, of course.
4. Irritated to the maxx! Mrs. Pec couldn't shut her trap about us not talking. Who in the world cares?!?! >; And I couldn't concentrate and whatever. I was just so damn lazy. And it was humid but rainy. So irritating!

Daddy picked me up after school. Wanted to cruise with ash n' kumori them but uh .. I'm tired, i'm not feelin' the weather, and I got chores! Since when do I ever get chores?!? Psh, now that my dad is home all day .. I take over for my mom. BOOHOO.

Welll, hopefully Zaylarina comes over tonight. I HOPE! I can't see her tomorrow if she ends up coming over tomorrow! -__- I miss her. Lol, she's probably only one who can make me happy right now =) Hm, thank god tomorrow is the last day of the week for school. All I know is- KALIHI BOUND this weekend =) Yayyyy!

Problem is,

Too many people go around searching to find someone to spend their whole life with and then when they've finally found the person; all of a sudden things seem to be falling into place. Unfortunately, searching for love keeps you at a greater risk of getting hurt. Well, maybe I'm wrong? Point is, Don't go searching for love, let love find you. What's meant to be will always find it's way and if it's not then let it be .. what can we do right? We can't be forced to fall in love, love just comes naturally. Just like what they all say: "Good things fall apart so better things fall together." Let it be, love is love. You can't put the peices back to a puzzle just to watch it fall apart, all over again. Something to think about, eh?

Meaningful.

I loooove quotes! <3
“The beauty of a woman is not the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman must be seen from in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides.”-- Audrey Hepburn

"Sometimes you have to be strong for yourself. you have to know that you're a good person and a good friend. what’s meant to be will end up good and what's not - won’t. love is worth fighting for, but sometimes you can't be the only one fighting. at times, people need to fight for you. if they don't, you just have to move on and realize what you gave them was more than they were willing to give you. hopefully, people realize great things when they come around. and don't lose something real. always fight, until you can't anymore, and then be fought for." - Unknown.

At this moment, there are 6,470,818,671 people in the world. Some are running scared, some are coming home. Some tell lies to make it through the day, others are just now facing the truth. Some are evil men at war with good, & some are good struggling with evil. Six billion people in the world, six billion souls. & sometimes, all you need is o n e.

"The important thing is not to be bitter over life's dissapointments. Learn to let go of the past and recognize that everday won't be sunny, & when you find yourself lost in the darkness of despair, remember- it's only in the black of night that you will see the stars, and those stars lead you back home.. so don't be afraid to make mistakes, to stumble & fall, because most of the time the greatest rewards come from doing things that scare you the most. Maybe you'll get everything you wish for, Maybe you could get more than you could have imagined. Who knows where life will take you?" - Unknown.

Don't stop at dead-ends. Break the wall down, & KEEP GOING.

MHM.

Maybe I am .. In denial?




;/

Thank god,

ITS FRIDAY!

I could have sworn i've been tired alll 2nd period this whole week. -__-
Talk about lack of sleep! HAHA. Today was the normal Friday it always is. Geometry is just getting boring by the minute. Pasalo is giving us like 5-8 pages a day, it sucks! >;( Biology is lame. Fell asleep off n' on either cause Bri or Anakin kept slapping me, or because Komm talks to fucking loud. Gosh. But even if, I still managed to take notes n' arrange my binder. Lunch was nothing new. Went to D for a bit, but it was B O R I N G! So ash & I went to Canon's 'cause we miss em! :) Alan came after. Took pictures with Alan since it was his last day at Campbell ;( So junnk! Health wasn't much. Ran 2 laps. Retook my test since I sort of failed. ;( And just talked stories. English was alright. Pec's gettin' better with work and shit. Me & Nave we're partners for reading but we didn't even get the reading done. Afterschool was okay. Tagged along with Ash & Jason. Went to 7-11 to buy musubi's then met up with ethel and just chillled. Went over to ashs' and waited for my mom there.

It's friday and I don't have nothing in the world to do!! >;( UGH, I wish I could drive already!

Different

Today was a different day and something i'll remember forever!! >_< Wont go into details 'cause confidential, haha.

Anywho, School was the same except for the fact that today was school-wide writing day and it sucked! I was lost half the time but thanks to Jayr! Life-saver. HA. Lunch was fun but 4th period, ugh .. I was just not feelin' it already. ;( Afterschool, waited for Jason to pick us up and headed to MickyD's. Bought McChicken for me ash & ethel. Car-ride was fun but Asing park wasn't! ;( Chilled at Ethels after .. THANKS ETHEL & ASHLEY! I love you guys forevvvva!

Mommy picked me up, crashed for 4 hours when I got home and then Zayla woke me up by slapping my face, thanks to my mom >;] Lol, I love my neice <3 Anyway, Currently on the phone with Leslie and i'm really bored n' my heads bangin'. Gonna get some shut-eye since I have to wake up early tomorrow :)

Yaaay

Everyday is just going by super fast! Meaning, I'm having fun! HAHA.

Aw I loved yesterday, today, and I hope tomorrow's even BETTER! :D

I love my grades since my Cumalitive GPA is 3.417 YAY! ^_^

Okay, not to sound all cocky but whatever. Lol. There's not really much to

update on. But today is Brandon Ponce's birrrthday! YOU STILL OWE

ME AND MY COUSINS A DAY OUT :) haha. Well yeah, aside from school,

and that .. I'm finally gonna get to go shopping today. It's been awhile!

Last time I went shopping that I can remember of was like right after New

Years.. >_<

The smell of raw fish is so stink! Ugh. Mmkay holler on the G1.

<3

REPORT CARDS

My day was mighty-fine :D Nothing boring for the most parts.

1. Worked on a new section which was 8 pages of Geometry! Yeah, it's not that hard but I find it hard to listen all the time especially when I have Ash in the back (or front) & my cousin on the side. Always havin' side conversations, lol! Oopsies! Well I got it finished before class ended anyway so i'm all gee :)
2. This class if the most boringest class ever! Ugh. Worked in our groups and I swear I was falling asleep >;[ But I finished up my work anyway.
3. Ran 1 lap and did work the whole period. Me and michelle pretty much just tweaked on my G1 most of the time.
4. Had Mrs. Hood for sub. Did work, and then chillled n' talked stories. Ash & I just kept laughing, ;D "BE QUAAT"

Afterschool: Rode CityBus to Ethel's house. Ordered pasta from pizza hut .. LOL. Put make up on each other which is fricking hilarious! It was one of those 'you-had-to-be-there' moments! LOL. Omgsh, it was super ugly, you don't even know! Ha! Cleaned up our faces after and just talked bout stupid stuffs ;P Crazzzeh! Mommy picked me up afterwards. Stopped by Foodland on the way home. Oh btw! Report cards came in today. Got a 3.0GPA. Not quite satisfied 'cause Ramos gave me a C but whatever. I know better now :)

I'm cramping like a bitch right now ;( I think my monthly friend is kiccking in!

SAD

It started off as a normal good Sunday. RCIA was good. Learn things, yet again. How to be humble. We even prayed for those who think they don't need Jesus in their life and those who think their top-notch and alll that shaaaz .. Cassie, Dulce, Janice & I all thought about and prayed for the same people HAHA. No names mentioned ;X

So about my whole headline thing.. During class, I was texting my cousin Leslie, and she was telling me how her grandma's blood pressure was super low already. And right there, I felt like super sad.. Not to sound lame but it's like I can feel what they feel you know? So class got done a little later than 11:30. My cousin Klayre called me. Telling me how their grandma had just passed away. And how we we're all supposed to go to their house for the SUPERBOWL. But right now isn't even a good time to be all happy, well for them atleast. But the saddest thing is to watch the person you love so much pass away right in front of your eyes. It really is sad. ;( Even though your whole family is hurting right now, just know that my prayers go out to you guys & stay strong!

So after that phonecall my daddy was already there to pick me up. Then, I get a call from my mom and she goes all ballistic on me for god-knows-what! She's always yelling at me, even when I don't do anything wrong! >;( And when I do something right, she's not even happy about it! Ugh .. And now we're not talking -__- I have like a handful on things weighing down on my shoulders right now n' im super stressed. I feel like my head is about to explode! So lame, ugh. But anyway, you see .. My life isn't as perfect as you think it is! Well it shouldnt be perfect anyway, but it can be close to it. Well whatever, you get the point. Sometimes behind every girls smile, lies something totally different- more of the opposite, you know?



All I can do for now is pray 'till things get better. Things will; eventually, I HOPE. But condolences to my cousins family. And R.I.P. to their grandma. ;( Mmhm, Today is like the saddest sunday of 2009.

Anyhoots, I felt like blogging my feelings 'cause My family just isn't cooperating with me right now and I just don't wanna bother my cousins. Blah, what to do .. what to do? ;